Archive for July, 2008

I am TALENTED!!!

Thursday, July 24th, 2008

Can you run over your own foot on the stationary bike? So I’m at the gym today, I’ve done my CrossFit warmup and after a half mile of walking and running I’ve decided that the treadmill is just too boring to continue. Anyone else think that’s true too? I turn my music on, set my speed and just watch my boobs bounce till I can’t breathe anymore. Then I slow down to recover and start all over again. ‘Bout a half mile is all I can handle.

So I went over to the stationary bike. Not anymore exciting, granted, but at least it has the big wheel thingy that works like a fan and I stay cool. Looking cool is a whole other story. It’s been 15 minutes. I’m almost done. I’ve just spent the last 2 minutes using only my arms and am trying to get my feet back on the pedals. One foot on. I had no idea this was going to be so difficult, I mean, I ride usually once a week. I’ve ridden a bike as long as I can remember. But for some unknown reason my other foot slip off the pedal and winds up under it on the way down. Smashed my foot, knocked the bike out of line, made me look like a big dumb doofus. At least I didn’t cuss out loud. And better, it looked like no one noticed. Wasn’t so lucky the day I fell on the treadmill.

Good grief. You’d think doing all this work and gaining muscle tone and balance and power I’d be a little more graceful but I’m more clumsy now that my sister ever was. I’m covered in bruises and I know part of it is bruising easily but dang. I cut my finger a few weeks ago with my new knife. Bad cut, prolly should have had stitches, and it’s still pretty sore. A few days later I cut two other fingers on the same durn hand with the same durn knife! Both my hip bones are sore cause I was walking while carrying the laundry basket and ran into the door facing. On the way into the mud room and again on the way out. Jeez.

Oh well. It’s late. I’m off to bed. Unless I fall going up the stairs. ‘Night!

p

You think your week was bad?

Tuesday, July 22nd, 2008

Last week, actually I think it might have been the week before, God called me a jackass. Seriously. And he used a Bible verse to do it. Don’t believe me? look it up. Psalms 32:8-9. Don’t have your bible right there? Don’t know about Biblegateway.com? Here you go.

Psalm 32:8-9 (King James Version)

8. I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye.

9. Be ye not as the horse, or as the mule, which have no understanding: whose mouth must be held in with bit and bridle, lest they come near unto thee.

Now here’s the context.  For about 4 weeks in June and July our pastor did a study on being stuck. In your job, in your marriage, in your home life with kids, in your walk with Him, whatever. The first story he used to illustrate being stuck was Gideon threshing wheat in a wine press.  Now, I will admit I don’t know, right off the top of my head, the whole story of Gideon, I haven’t even seen the whole Veggie Tales version. But I do know he was pretty much living in fear, pretty much not wanting to be noticed, believing himself to have been abandoned by God, threshing wheat in a wine press so that the Midianites couldn’t get it. Now, the preacher went into detail about this whole threshing wheat thing and the basis behind it is that you toss the wheat into the air and the wind separates the chaff from the wheat.  A wine press is a great big whole in the ground. No wind. So he’s doing pretty much a pointless job and getting no results at all. The preacher’s phrase was “don’t be a chicken in a wine press”.  That one phrase has stuck with me for weeks and I’ve been struggling with it and praying about it ever since. Probably my biggest fear is talking to other people about God. I’ve had more than one prime opportunity where the only other person in the room with me has flat out said “I don’t get this whole GOD thing, I don’t think there is a God and even if you tried you couldn’t prove it”. One time I was pretty young and in awe of the girl that was “heathen” and the other time I was just plain scared and told her “so if you don’t think there is a God and there is no hell, I hope you’re right.” What was that? Certainly not any kind of witness that would make someone think I loved Jesus. My second biggest fear is that I’ll fail at raising my children to know and love and follow God. So I was struggling with that, don’t be a chicken in a wine press. Well, in my Tuesday morning Bible study, we have been going over the names of God from the verse “I am the way, the truth and the life”. The morning I’m talking about here we were studying “I am the way”. My only question to God until that very morning had been “God how do I do it? How do I make all these changes You seem to be showing me and how do I raise my children to hunger for You and how do I make myself a witness for Your glory?” The first thing I saw was the outline title for the day, “I am the way”. Ok, pretty clear, right? What’s that you say, Penny? You need it a little louder or clearer? Ok, I am God, I will provide. The first verse we looked at “Issiah 52:6, All we like sheep have gone our own way.” See there?  I know you want to go your own way. Not only that, I knew you were going to go your own way. More? Sure. Proverbs 12:15: “The way of the fool seems right to him…” Even when you’re not listening to Me, you’ll still think you’re right. I have to get your attention. Are you listening yet? Proverbs 14:12: “The way that seems right to man leads to death.” Wait, there’s more. Proverbs 19:2 “The soul that is without knowledge is not good, and he that runs, sins.” Now listen up, this part is important. Issiah 55:7-8 “Let the wicked turn from his ways…and let him turn to the Lord for He will have mercy on him and He will freely pardon….for My ways are not your ways.” Are you listening yet? There is no other way than MY way for you to accomplish all the things that I have shown you to do. I am the way. In 1 kings I have told you “there is no God like Me, I have kept My promise to those who walk in My way. I forgive them their sin and I will teach them My way.”  Your prayer should be ” teach my your way and show me your path.” (here it comes) I will  instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. I will counsel you and watch over you. (this part is more what I heard and not what is written) Don’t be a jackass that’s too stupid to come to me unless I grab his face.

Let’s just say that I’ve spent more time in prayer in the last 2 weeks than I have in my whole life. And also, let me yell from the top of my lungs right now that I am sooo very glad we serve a loving God who is faithful and just to forgive us no matter how many times we do the same darn thing over and over and over. But then He does have to remind me, Issiah 48:17-18 “I am the Lord your God who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go. If only you had paid attention to my commands your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea.”  But because it IS God and because He knows me I can say “yeah yeah, I know. But You like to let me wallow in my own misery, don’t you?” And do you know what answer I get? “To every thing there is a season.” Don’t tell me there is no God.

And with that, I’m off to bed. This was just as exhausting writing about as it was going through. Besides, I’ll need a whole post to itself about the Women of Faith conference.  Love ya’ll!!

p

Broccoli and Brussel Sprouts…

Tuesday, July 8th, 2008

I must confess. I only ate one of my Brussels sprouts today. Last night I made roasted pork chops, roasted broccoli, and steamed Brussels sprouts. (Oh yeah, we’re in the Zone). I fixed plates for everyone and put mine in the fridge cause the only time I had to go to the gym yesterday was when J got home. The kids, of course, didn’t eat all their vegetables. Little J ate most of his broccoli but S only ate meat. So I told them they would have them for breakfast. And they did. That’s all they were allowed to have this morning. There was much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth, and screaming and gagging and threatening to duct tape them to their chairs. But finally in the end S ate most of her veggies and so did Little J. I gave in and allowed them to go to little roots. (that’s their summer camp.) Afterwards, we came home to eat lunch. They had hamburgers with pickles. I heated up my dinner from last night. I love broccoli so that’s not a problem at all for me. I thought I loved Brussels sprouts. Not so, said the gag reflex. I managed to eat one. I snuck into the kitchen to toss the 3 remaining vomit balls into the trash before the kids saw me. As God is my witness, I’ll never cook Brussels sprouts again.

Next I’ll have to tell you the story about the chicken in a wine-press. But that’s more involved than I have time for right now. More later…

p

Monday, monday…

Monday, July 7th, 2008

Here’s your tip for the day. No margaritas the night before a hard workout. Holy pig snot, batman, even my sweat smelled like Cuervo. But I did a mile in 15 minutes tonight. I know, I know, that’s pathetic, but hey. It’s better than 20 minutes. My goal is a 5k in less than 30 minutes by the end of the month. So I guess my tip for the day is moot since there will be no more margaritas in either the near or distant future.  Oh well, no rest for the wicked, right?

So let’s see. Our 4th weekend was good.  Thursday night we went to see the Detroit Symphony at Greefirld Village, (http://www.hfmgv.org/) and after the concert there were fireworks, of course. The kids loved it. We went with J’s department at work and had a really good time.  The field where we were was a swamp, though. It was an outside in the park event only it was more a pit than a park, a big flat valley with steep hills on all 4 sides. So of course it had rained, no, I mean, stormed the night before. The steep hills were ok to spead a blanket on but the bottom had standing water in lots of places. So we spread a tarp on the ground and sat our chairs on top of it.  We did pretty well at staying out of the mud, just messy shoes when we got home.  That was Thursday. Friday, we did a whole lot of nothing all day long, then just before it got dark we went and bought our own fireworks. S loved it, she held sparklers, helped light sparklers, threw sparklers in the bucket of water, she had a great time. Little J didn’t like the loud noise. And here in Monkey Butt Michigan, the fun things are illegal. Here’s the rule: if it leaves the ground, if it explodes, if it spins, pops, whizzes, sparks, has a fuse, looks like fun, it’s illegal. No really. nothing that leaves the ground and nothing that explodes. No bottle rockets. No firecrackers. No Roman Candles. No great big huge things you have to drop down the iron pipe or they’ll fly out and chase Aunt Cathryn out of the yard. Nothing. You can’t even buy them. You can have sparklers. Oh and look, you can have sparklers that are 3 feet long. And here’s a cone that makes showers of sparklers.  How boring is that? How am I ever going to teach my son the joy of watching a lizard fly across the lane with a bottle rocket shoved down its throat? Or burying a line if firecrackers in an ant bed? My poor deprived children.  So that was Friday. Saturday was another day with a whole lot of nothing. Not even fireworks that night. Just baths and bed early. Then Sunday we had church and after that we met friends from church at the city pool and swam long enough for J to get burned (even with lots of sunscreen) and the kids were waterlogged. Then they all came back to our house for burgers and hotdogs and this wonderful shrimp that one friend made. Oh yeah, and margaritas. It was a great afternoon. Today the kids and I didn’t leave the house all day. We slept late, we watched TV, we took naps, it was great.

But now it’s bedtime, I don’t think I’m going to make it before midnight, I still have to have a shower before bed cause really, tequilla smells bad enough the first time. Sweated out, let’s just say J hasn’t gotten close to me in the 2 hours I’ve been home from the gym. Ok, I’ll post more later. My goal for this week is to shave at least 4 minutes off my mile time, then next week I’m adding another mile. Pray for me.

Love ya’ll!

p